I have had a hard time lately figuring out who I am, and I think this post is as much about explaining myself to me as it is for anyone else.

My favorite things:
A good song
Riding alone in the desert with a few cows (once my grandfather dropped me off several miles from the ranch to gather eleven rogue pairs. I was hungry, cold, and it rained, but i was completely happy)
The smell of horse sweat
cattle drives
My family
old timers
good stories
good books
A hard days work
old movies
being too tired to eat
building fence
building/creating
writing(when i do)
challenges
playin guitar/singing (even if my skills are limited)
lost country singers
motorcycles
open road with new music
hiding out
jam sessions with friends
Getting to know people (it's like opening presents)
camaraderie
being generous (also a downfall in college)
Fritos (my cat)
troubled kids
pushing my limits (love/hate)
the smell of a cigarette smoke in a bar or house(weird, but it reminds me of old friends of my grandpa's that i am close to)
smoking cigarettes(i am not a smoker cause it's so unhealthy, but if it wasn't i would be)
my mom
once in a while you meet someone you can visit with for hours, and you find that you are really actually intrigued by what they have to say, not just what you have to tell them. i like that.
my grandpas sentimental speeches
when my grandpa gets teared up
that my grandmother worries about me more than a grandma should
getting to grow up having different sets of parents (grandparents, parents and uncles)
camping
funny people
ranching
watching an animal give birth/be born
bringing people together
drinking out of streams, and jumping in the really cold ones
culture
exercise(climbing, running, lifting, anything really)
things not yet discovered


Things that i hate:
watching people around me hurt and not being able to fix it
watching people around me make bad decisions and not being able to stop them
drinking more than i should
hurting people i care about
being bad at things
debbie downers
getting out of sleeping bags when it's cold
ignorance
mean people, not towards me- i can handle it, but towards others
makeup on girls (a little is good at times, but wearing lots of makeup is like lying)
being treated the way i was in highschool
people who do not take care of their animals
when i don't spend enough time with my own
losing my temper with an animal
lying
watching an animal die painfully or suffer (especially if it was my fault, which has happened before, i will never forget it)
putting an animal down
people trying to take over what i'm doing, even if they are better at it, for chrissakes just lemme figure it out
worrying all the time
sitting in classrooms
when i am lazy
slow people
i don't hate people who cheat, i have good friends who do. but i myself hate the idea all together
settling



Things that hurt me:
a few people i love
my mom if she wants to (rarely, and only if i deserve it)
Myself
and someone else i haven't met yet will probably have that ability

Things i am scared of:
losing those i love
judgment
river kayaking (did it once, thought i was going to die)
disappointing certain people
losing myself
being vulnerable